I’m With Stupid

Even dumbasses enjoy Quizzo team trivia with local comic Sean Maguire. Take his quiz here, put your brain to the test! 

I must be some kinda masochist, the way I love Quizzo.

Specific details are not my forte. My brain is more geared towards “big picture” thinking so I’m good at recognizing patterns and inconsistencies, but recalling names, dates, and numbers – not so much.  Add great beer choices, and I’m pretty much useless.

But Quizzo is not about winning. OK maybe it is if you’re a smartypants but for the rest of us, it’s still a fantastic activity for a night out with friends – cause you play in teams! In fact, coming up with a team name is part of the fun. There are entire websites with suggestions like Tequila Mockingbird, Trivia Newton-John, Periodic Table Dancers, I Thought This Was Speed Dating…. You get the picture.

Flannel-clad bartender & comedian Sean Maguire is East Falls’ resident Quizzo Czar – an expert emcee with improv chops and a vault of cerebrum-teasing questions. He’s also got PRIZES! In most cases, top three winners get a bar tab credit or a gift certificate. Trivia buffs: your evening could pay for itself. (Not the way I drink, but it’s certainly possible.) Also there are free pens.

Rules are simple: answer the questions. The bigger your team, the harsher you’re graded. Sean’s advice for first-timers? “Don’t take it too seriously, and absolutely no cell phones. Also tip your servers.”

So who’s usually better at Quizzo, guys or girls?  “Don’t take it too seriously,” Sean told us, “And absolutely no cell phones. Also tip your servers.” Ohhh I see what he did there….

TEST YOUR CHOPS:  No fair looking stuff up. Your score here helps predict your level of success in actual play (answers at end of post).

  1. Which Green Day hit climbed the British charts ahead of Donald Trump’s UK visit this summer?
  2. Which member of the 2008 World Champion Phillies announced his retirement as of the end of this season?
  3. What soda company put up a billboard in Manayunk trolling the soda tax saying “Refreshingly tax free in Montgomery County”?
  4. Which 2008 Pixar film has a popular fan theory that its titular character is secretly a murderous, psychopathic robot?
  5. Rittenhouse Town on Lincoln Drive was the site of the first paper mill in what country’s colonies? a. England  b. Germany   c. Holland   d. Spain
  6. Which horse, with Philadelphia ties, fell shy of winning the 2004 Triple Crown, after losing by just 1 length to Birdstone at the Belmont Stakes?
  7. Which sauce is more popular for chicken wings nationwide: Ranch or Blue Cheese?
  8. What was the original flavor of Twinkies? a. Strawberry  b. Banana   c.  Pineapple   d. Orange
  9. Which former brewery that proclaimed its “Well Earned Supremacy” stood on the corner of Conrad and Indian Queen until 1997?
  10. Which legendary watering hole, once named the best Irish bar in the state, has a strict no-Bon Jovi rule, in effect since the early 2000s?   

HOW’D YOU DO? (Scroll down for answers)

10 – 7 correct:  You’re a ringer with an extensive knowledge of the arcane. You will help lead your teammates to victory if they don’t run you off first for being a know-it-all.
6 – 3 correct:  If you have areas of expertise, they’re narrow. Your main function is providing thoughtful opinions when the team must puzzle out an educated guess. Without a ringer, your team’s kinda screwed.
2 – 0 correct:  Did you even try? There’s always that person who’s more into the social aspects of Quizzo than the thinking part – guilty as charged. No worries, we can focus our energy on enjoying great food/beer/company and, of course, heckling Sean!

EAST FALLS QUIZZO: It’s a game, it’s a floorshow. Sean’s an award-winning performer with roots in NYC’s prestigious Upright Citizens Brigade.  He’s a rising star — or at least some kind of comet. Catch his funny, interactive trivia competition as it orbits favorite local bars and restaurants:

Mondays at La Roca (Manayunk) 7:30pm – 9:30pm

Every other Tuesday night at Billy Murphy’s Irish Saloon 8:30pm –  10:30pm (7/31, 8/14, 8/28 etc)

Every Thursday at Wissahickon Brewing Company 7:30pm – 9:30pm plus a special Comedy Night every 2nd Wednesday (except August, when he’s on vacation so comedy night is 8/1).

PLUS! Quizzo at Tio Flores’ on South Street the first Wednesday of every month (this one is for the late crowd, starting at 9:30pm).

Sean’s also doing historic trivia at RittenhouseTown’s Drink History event Saturday August 18th. In addition, “For some reason, I’m hosting karaoke at Fallser Fest this year,” he told us, “I don’t know why, I can’t sing. But it’ll be fun. And/or terrible.”

Keep up to date on all Sean’s gigs in the neighborhood and around the city at large: seanpmaguire.com

ANSWERS:   1 American Idiot   2 Chase Utley   3 Pepsi   4 Wall-E   5 a. England   6 Smarty Jones   7 Ranch   8 b. Banana   9 Hohenadel   10 Billy Murphy’s

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