Ninja in the New Year?

The Ninja rides into the sunset like a Pizza Cowboy.

Greetings loyal review readers. Here we are in 2019, back with another round of East Falls Pizza Reviews. But are we?

A bit of background:

In early August of this year, the Ninja decided to start an Instagram account to document his pizza adventures. A full 360-degree social media experience, if you will. But what happened soon after was something that no one could predict.

The Ninja found himself starting to eat pizza every day. Sometimes twice a day. All in the pursuit of likes and followers. By November, he had amassed over 1000 pictures of pizza alone on his cell phone. Family members were starting to get concerned. Co-workers were starting to make comments.

At one point, the Ninja started eating so much pizza, he stopped posting some of it on Instagram out of shame. It had developed into an addiction, both social media, and food. What began as a bit of performance art soon spiraled out of control into a situation of life imitating art far more than art imitates life.

The final straw was Halloween, when the Ninja insisted on dressing his own daughter up as a slice of pizza.

As of today, the Ninja is happy to report that he is 4 weeks off of the pizza. Sure, he’s had a slice of tomato pie here or there, maybe a cauliflower crust pie or two, baby steps! But he thinks he’s kicked the ‘za addiction:

What will come in the new year? Maybe the Ninja falls off the proverbial pizza wagon? Maybe some pop-up Ninja Pizza Reviews IN MODERATION? Who’s to say? But at this point, the Ninja has to ride off into the sunset like a Pizza Cowboy.

I would bid you all adieu, but the Ninja isn’t French and the French have never put out any pizza worth a damn anyway.



About Pizza Ninja 22 Articles
Born in Chicago, arguably the capitol of world class pizza options, the Pizza Ninja consumes pizza an average of 3 to 4 nights a week. From local options to frozen pizza, no crust is left behind. He has been eating pizza for 34 years and currently resides in East Falls along with his wife, daughter and two dogs. On occasion, he will graciously share a slice of his pizza with them. Follow the Ninja on Instagram.

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