When technology, family, and friendship all need a reset.
🌴SAND, SUN, SANITY
Q: We’re planning a big family vacation this summer and I’ve just realized we have wildly different ideas of “relaxing.” I want beach naps, my cousins want zipline excursions and group games. How do I preserve my peace without spoiling their fun?
A: The trick is to plan for both chaos and calm. Before you go, set up a shared calendar or group chat where everyone can drop in their must-do’s — excursions, dinners, even lazy afternoons. Seeing your vacation “activity board” all in one place helps everyone spot overlaps and gaps.
It also keeps expectations realistic. If you need quiet mornings or solo walks, block them off early and say so. Explain that you’re there to enjoy the trip and your own sanity. Encourage others to do the same — a vacation that lets everyone breathe is far better than one that tries to make everyone identical.
Money can be another hidden stressor, so check in on budgets early. Not everyone wants to pay for every activity, and that’s okay. You can split into smaller groups for outings or rotate who plans dinner each night.
Finally, take a moment to remember why you’re all doing this: it’s a rare thing to have the whole family together in one place. There will be feelings — that’s part of the deal. Laugh, compromise, take too many photos, and let go of the idea that you have to do it all. The best memories usually happen in between the plans anyway.
💬THREAD LIGHTLY
Q: My friend group has a text thread, and lately it’s turned into a place to vent about partners — often in really specific or graphic detail. I love these friends, but it feels icky to read such personal stuff about people I know. Should I speak up or just mute the thread?
A: Start small — not with a manifesto. Try something like “Yikes, TMI!” to signal that the convo has drifted past your comfort zone. If it keeps happening, you can gently follow up with something like, “Love you guys, but I don’t need this much intel about everyone’s love life.”
This sets a boundary without turning the group into a courtroom drama. Most people don’t realize when they’re oversharing — until someone flags it kindly.
Of course, if the thread stays a little too spicy for your taste, muting it is a perfectly mature move. You don’t owe constant availability, nor should you feel the need to make an announcement on your way out, either. Just step back quietly and rejoin if/when the vibe feels right.
You can still show up for your friends in real life, where tone and empathy travel better than emojis ever can. And hey, give yourself credit — it’s not easy to navigate group-chat etiquette in the age of unfiltered access. Keep your sense of humor, protect your peace, and remember: silence is golden, but a well-placed 🫢 can work wonders.
💓 HEARTS AND ALGORITHMS 🤖
Q: My best friend has started using an AI chatbot as a sort of emotional outlet, and now she sends me screenshots of her “conversations” instead of actually talking to me about her problems. I’m feeling weirdly replaced. Is this just the new normal?
A: It might be a new normal — but that doesn’t mean it has to be your normal. Tell your friend you miss her voice, her thoughts, and the way the two of you used to talk things through. Frame it as care, not criticism: “I love that you’re finding ways to sort things out, but I really miss talking with you.” Sometimes people turn to AI because it feels safe and judgment-free, not because they want to shut others out.
That said, it’s good that you’re uneasy. Chatbots can mimic empathy, but they don’t actually care about anyone’s well-being. They mirror language, tone, and emotion — which means they can accidentally reinforce unhealthy thoughts or delusions, especially for people who are lonely or vulnerable.
Mental-health professionals have already documented “AI psychosis” cases where users became fixated on chatbot interactions that blurred the line between comfort and reality. The results have been deadly. This is a serious issue, and your friend should be aware of it.
AI can be a useful brainstorming tool or even a sounding board in moderation — but it’s not therapy, and it’s no substitute for human connection. Encourage your friend to keep her digital conversations in perspective, and invite her back into real ones with you.
You don’t have to compete with an algorithm; you just have to remind her what real friendship feels like — unpredictable, messy, genuine, and human. That’s a kind of intelligence no machine can replicate.
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